Came and Went

Christmas came and went.
My tree is still standing (13'8" high)
      It is still drinking water and the pine cones are popping
            Music to my ears.
The kids' gifts are no longer all over the living room.
       They are secure in boxes by the mammoth tree . . .
               On the kitchen table . . .
                     On the stairs . . .
                           On the counter . . .
                                 And even the floor of my shower.
The Kinect is played daily
       hourly
                minutely
                        (is minutely even a word?)
Most of the gifts have been delivered or picked up . . . most
          not all
              isn't that true every year?

Our kids were blessed this season with Nook Tablets.  They are all filling them up with books, apps, and watching Netflix.  They are so pleased and happy that I am so pleased and happy.

You know what else makes me happy?  Jason's new luggage from Grandpa.  We packed a weeks worth of clothes in it and sent him off to a tournament in Seattle the day after Christmas.  They have played 2 games already - one win, one tie.  He has a goal and a penalty - not great, but acceptable.  Personally, I think he could work harder.  But I always think that.

Carly is off to cousin Madison's house to spend the night.  We gathered up all of the gifts for them and went over today since we didn't see them on Christmas.  We got them a tote of Christmas decor for next year, labels, sharpies, tape, and wrapping paper.  Ridiculous I know, but it was all 70% off.  LOVE IT!  Carly packed up her nook and pillow pet, put on her new middle schooler type clothes, and went out for the night looking totally adorable in her new jacket from Grandpa.  Her other jacket went missing at a hockey practice.  Grandpa felt pretty bad about that and picked her out a white jacket on HUGE discount.  YAY and she loves it.  I was sketchy about a white jacket, but not her.  She even found a head band to match for 2$.  WOW.
She also acquired new bedding - NOT a mommy blanket.  She has always wanted bedding from a store, not from mom.  Her last quilt was made by me and given to her for her 7th birthday.  Her first was made for her for her 4th birthday.  She is 11 and has finally got something else.

Caden has been stuck like glue to his nook.  He is deeply into parkour and spends much time watching you tube videos and martial arts movies.  I introduced him to Jet Li last night and he was already a big Jackie Chan fan.  He also loved, loved, loved his legos.

So, I lay here on the huge lounge style sofa sectional and listen to Jay snore at 9:30 pm, to rock music coming from Caden's Nook even though he has earbuds in, and to the history channel (which I am not a huge fan of). The tree and stove, alike, are crackling.  Esme is stirring, trying to get comfortable on the sofa as I move the pillows around, and I can hear the clothes spinning in the dryer.  It is quiet and peaceful, but sad.

I miss my kids when they aren't home, especially after a holiday when they are off of school.

A Hockey Mom

Being a hockey mom is like any other mom.  I don't think we are any different than anyone else except we wear more clothes and mittens are a must have!

I recently cut the sleeves off of an old, brightly colored Gap sweater I had ages ago and made rink mittens.  My hand warmers fit in the ends nicely and the colors match any jacket I happen to wear.

My oldest, as everyone in the world knows by now, is a hockey/baseball player.  The trouble with being a baseball player in Alaska is . . . its a very short season!  Hockey however, begins in August and goes into March.  Then there are tryouts and camps and other skating opportunities thrown in there all spring and summer.

Right now, he plays comp hockey at the Bantam AAA level and high school hockey.  He has also just applied to be on Team Alaska for the Arctic Winter Games in Whitehorse (Canada).  His comp experience is rough and he doesn't always love his team mates, and they do not always love him either.  They have been playing together for many, MANY years.  BUT his high school team makes him VERY HAPPY! 

That is why his freshly broken ankle is such a heart breaker!

It started with a Friday night game against an out of town team of BIG boys.  Jason is the starting center for the high school team as a Freshman.  That is how much he loves the game.  At the end of the 2nd period, one of his team mates goes in for a big check . . . but he didn't see little Jason behind the kid he was going in for.  The player from the other team moved out of the way and Jason was hit instead.  My heart sunk.  I wanted to run onto the ice - but you just can't do that.  The team has 3 coaches and a trainer.  I ran down to the rink doors and then turned away.  He just got cleared after a slight concussion and this was his first day back.  His body went limp on the ice and I heard gasps in the crowd.  One man said, "holy cow, he isn't even moving."  I was with my friend at the time and she was very comforting.  I have to admit, I flew right past family and went straight to her - I even bypassed my husband. I knew he didn't need to see the mommy panic, he panics enough for his first born.

We had just, the day before, replaced his 4 year old helmet too with some grand concussion helmet.  He was fighting us on wearing it, saying it felt weird, but his coach wouldn't let him trade it out.  Thank You John!  That helmet saved my boy, I know it.  The player that hit him is more than double Jason's weight and a foot taller.

My brother happened to be at the game that night and another players dad, both EMT's.  Thank you Kev and Chad.

When my friend Heidi found me, it was to inform me they called an ambulance.  At no point did I know what was going on.  All I saw was the hit and my family going out to take care of my boy.  John was first to him, though Jason has no idea.  To hear John tell the story it is even more frightening.  His heart dropped as well when he saw the hit and Jason go down.  That was the moment I knew John was more family than just another person we took into our home.  Jason doesn't remember talking to John or answering questions.  He only remembers the trainer, Jeremy - who was the 2nd or 3rd person to him.

My brother and Chad swooped in and took over.  Then Jay flew out onto the ice and Jason said, "Dad, tell them I'm okay."  After 10 minutes or so I still hadn't heard what was going on.  I watched more EMT's come in the door, but no one rushed out to the ice.  My boy was in the best hands already.  My town has great emergency medical staff.  My husband convinced them to help Jason up and get him off of the ice and into the locker room.  They let the clock run down and the second period ended.  Jason sat up with his team in the locker room and they had a meeting.

He told the boy that hit him not to think about it.  Just think about the next period . . . the next game.  I still hadn't seen Jason at this point.  Once the third period began and Jason didn't come out on of the locker room, I went in.  Just in time to see them doing a concussion test - WHICH HE PASSED WITH FLYING COLORS!

Not only did Chad clear him, the ambulance staff cleared him and his trainer.  He told them he was sore in the neck and shoulder, but upon examining him, they found no reason to believe there was an injury. 

The boy put on his gear and went back on the ice!  He played the third period, almost every shift.  He was a lightening bolt out there.  I was mortified and amazed.

The next day he broke his ankle.

The second game of the weekend and he took a couple nasty hits.  One gave him what he calls a "dead arm" and he was having trouble stopping the puck with his stick . . . so he threw his body down to block a shot.  One slap shot from a 16-17 year old boy.  He got helped off of the ice, sat for a few shifts and was right back at it!  I assumed all was well and let him go to a movie after the game.

He woke up the next morning with a swollen ankle, but he had another game - so off he went.  He played a hard three periods and then off to the ER. 



My son is anything but normal.

I am emotionally drained and could use some sleep.  Especially with no one sleeping around the house due to various colds and ailments.  I've been up since 3am myself and now have a full day of kiddos. 

Hockey breaks my heart and makes my day.  I love it and hate it.  Many times I can't watch and I find myself pacing behind the crowd. 

Thank you Bauer, for keeping my child's noggin' safe.

What a weekend. Whew.

The team had two final games, Saturday night and Sunday morning.

Saturday night they had an off game and the North Stars tied our Lions.  We spent the 2nd and 3rd periods in the penalty box from some less than acceptable calls and the NS seemed like they were continually on the power play.  Jason, of course, was one of those bodies filling our box.  He's got such mouth on him out there - I don't think its a bad thing - he usually picks one player to piss-off and then they go at each other and they both end up in the box.

Sunday morning what a joke.  He and some other players got ready and then they listen to their headphones to prep and get psyched for their game.  If there is something you should know about Jason, its that he is a wasp out there on the ice.  He zips around at full speed 99% of the time.  He hits hard and hustles.  He puts his whole heart into his play.  His rituals are important to him.  He was told by the asst capt to take off his headphones.  He did not do it.  He (and several other players) did not see the reason as long as he was sitting quietly not disrupting anyone else.  Then another player took his headphones and choice words were exchanged.  So then they ran to coach and played tattle-tale.  He was told to take his gear off so he did.  Then he was told to put it on.  So he did, but not before he said, "make up your mind."  He was benched for the first period of the game.  Super Lame!

He is so entertaining to watch and brings fire to the team with his energy.  There isn't anyone who has as much energy on the ice, no one with as much stamina.

I sound like a mom, I know.  But its true.  Coaches have been saying it for years.

Well, he went in 2nd period and lit up the ice.  He headed in for a legal check and the kid saw him coming and lifted his elbow, stick butt and all.  The butt of the stick landed right on Jason's Adam's apple.  

Jase went down, out of breath and shocked.  His face got smashed into the ice and the face mask shifted and dug into his neck and chin.

He finally got off of the ice when he could catch his breath.  We didn't think much of it until the coach and team manager started flipping out.  If I didn't take him to the ER they were calling 911.  Jason didn't want to go, but the panic around him made him panic.  

Not to say he wasn't in severe pain and discomfort, he definitely was.

We took off across the street to the ER (strategically placed I'm sure).  

They needed to give him morphine to calm him down.  They iced it, did a CT scan to make sure nothing crushed, and then shot him up with morphine again and sent us home.

He can't swallow well yet and is on day two of liquids.  I think he will be pretty fatigued for high school hockey tryouts tonight, not to mention he is scared out of his mind of getting hit or bumped wrong.

His neck is so sore, especially his throat.  

I know he is fine and that is great. I do feel bad that he has pain, but I know it will be gone soon.  They figure 6 days tops.  But he has no restrictions.

I hope he has it in him to put his heart and soul into tonight's tryout.

Jason after his first injection, getting ready for a CT scan

Sort of a picture of his neck and chin.  It didn't come out too well.  The swelling isn't as visible as it is from the front. 

Some of his teammates and friends came to visit.  To his left is his friend Cam.  They play both hockey and baseball together.  They have proven time and again that they are true friends to one another.  We're so grateful to this kid!

BUT that wasn't even everything!
During dinner, we learned that Jay's 87 yr old grandpop was missing in Warminster, PA.  He went out for a bike ride to the park but never made it back home.  There was a 8 or so hour search and he was finally found outside of a church in the opposite direction of the park.  He is doing fine, but everyone was so worried because he has dementia and diabetes.  He refused to go to the hospital and just wanted to go home for some oatmeal.  We got very little sleep waiting for out long distance up dates.  It was one of those sleeping with one eye open nights, always listening for the phone.

Foto Friday

Happy Friday!  This is Meatball Friday weekend (but having it Saturday).  We have meatball deliveries to make today and then will make another batch of 150 or so for Saturday evening.  Meatball weekends are always so fun and I can't wait to see all of the faces that will be popping in after Jason's game tomorrow afternoon.  Thinking of all of you that won't get to enjoy ball night.  Wish you were closer so you could wrap your mouth around the giant Italian balls.  - Yep, it never gets old.
Enjoy Foto Friday.

Arctic Lions Bantam Tier I team.  Truly the most immature Bantams in the country.
Jason is in the back row on the far right.  Yep, the one behaving while the coach sticks his finger in his ear.   

My birch trees as they lose their leaves in September.  I love birch trees!

A picture Caden when Jay and I took him out to dinner before one of Jason's hockey games this last weekend.  Caden  had already eaten but had a craving for cheese sticks - he thought the container for his snack was the coolest thing.  I just love that kid - 

Some of my Autumn decorations.  I usually don't decorate at all, but I finally realized that the decorations are a way to refresh my home as the weather changes.  It happens rather fast up here and can get depressing in you aren't busy.  I am loving the new decorations though and it warms the feeling of my home, especially when I light all the candles and start a fire.  

Me and my big girl, Sister.
 We got her the summer we moved to Alaska.  Caden wasn't quite 2, and neither was Sister.  They have grown up together and seem to be best friends. I call her my big momma now.  She is graying around the eyes and nose, she gets sore hips if she plays catch too much, and she runs to round up our Cavapoo pup, Esme, when it is time to come inside.  Sister did a great job training Esme too.  She potty trained her and taught her that indoors is for laying and outdoors is for playing.  Sister is an amazing dog.  She was a rescue by GRRF and trained well after they fixed her hips - she had fallen out of a truck.  She is excellent with children, especially babies.  They can do anything they want with her and if we say "nice", sister will take it all.  If we don't, she will occasionally get up and walk away.  She is always gentle.  When the kids were little, she would round them up too by nudging them toward me or grabbing their sleeve or mitten with her teeth and pulling them toward me.  She is very social too.  That is just a nice way of saying she loves to run around the neighborhood and visit.  And she loves, loves, loves hunting season!  That means someone has moose bones in their backyard somewhere and she just needs to sniff them out.
Neighborhood dogs love her too.  Other labs and retrievers are always stopping by to say "hi" and run around the yard with her.
Looking for a dog?  Try a pre-trained rescue.  They become instant family members and bring unconditional love and joy to your children.

Home Coming Weekend . . .

Yeah, it doesn't really mean anything here and that makes me SAD!

My son goes to the high school I graduated from and now its homecoming.  I was one of those horrible cheerleaders that totally got into all of the high school events.  I worked on homecoming floats, I attended assemblies, ya know, the whole high school experience.

I think Jason would be like that . . . but he plays hockey.

This weekend he has 3 hockey games that happen to coincide with the homecoming football game.  The homecoming dance happens right after his 3rd game Saturday.

He is in game mode and said its to make his dad realize he is serious about hockey.

I feel bad for him. . . though I did get him to go to the last 45 minutes of the homecoming bonfire last night after his hockey practice.  I have to remember he has 3 more years of high school after this one and 5 more homecomings (fall and winter).

Sometimes I worry that he will be giving up so much of the high school experience for hockey - but I have to trust him and support his decision.  If he wants to give hockey his all, I guess I'm in, to a point.  I will not support him leaving town at 16 to live with another family thousands of miles away and home school himself.  I don't think I have to worry about that though . . . he isn't very big and his stats don't reflect his passion and speed.

So, his goal is to play for our local NAHL team as a high schooler . . . I'm afraid he'll be sadly disappointed though.  We aren't rolling in dough and he's never been a favorite of coaches.  Unfortunately, in our small town, things like money matter - who you're parents are - what school you go to - who your coaches were - yada yada yada.

Only time will tell - we'll see how the season goes.  They learn who their Captains are tonight - course, when the players know who the coaches choices are, its tough for them to vote honestly. . . so - probably the same ol' - same ol'.

Then there is high school hockey - hard to tell how much playing time a little guy will get.  BUT he DID just grow another 1/2 inch in the last 2 days.  He's always surprised by joint pain, but it always results in height.

Ya'll wanted to know about hockey - I'm sure.  Well, get used to it . . . its our life.  Three games this weekend and two days of tryouts for Carly.  I need a place to whine about what I don't like because I hate voicing my unhappiness in front of anyone around here - and it isn't fair for me to say anything about the players or team to Jason.  The kids have enough issues without their parents making it worse!

Welcome to Hockey Hell . . . ALREADY?

BUT FIRST . . . 
My sister posted a fantastic picture for Wordless Wednesday on her blog.  Check it out.  She takes great pictures and tried her hand at photo editing for this shot.  It is so great.
My Sister's Wordless Wednesday



I'm too wordy for Wordless Wednesday.  I'm thinking all of the time - most always positive and happy.  Last night I kind of ranted and raved though.  Jason's hockey team had their first scrimmage.

Yes, I'm going to talk comp hockey.  Get used to it.  Hockey is an 8 month sport at least!

So, he practiced with his line this weekend and week.  He was so happy, they were doing well.  It consisted of three kids known in the past for their ability to hustle down the ice and battle.  3/4 through the scrimmage, one of his line mates was traded.  Jason moved from center to wing - but he and the new line mate kept bumpin' into each other, as they play the same position normally.  It was a disaster and he was instantly down on himself and disappointed that he was no longer able to be the guy putting on the pressure.  He ended up spending a lot of time covering the defense that just couldn't remember to cover the net.

This all came out in a conversation on the way home - it isn't my perception.

Its just the beginning of the season, and I know that each day holds something knew for these kids and each game will provide new opportunities.   He's just got to hold on and keep pushing himself.

So, then they handed out new jerseys.  I didn't order Jason one because it is basically a two month season and then time off for high school hockey season, then they pick back up in February.  I didn't feel like spending a couple hundred dollars on new jerseys that I would have to replace next season.  Jason grew 4-5 inches this since May.  The next couple months are going to be much the same.  Why on Earth would I spend that money on a new set of jerseys when he'll only be able to wear it a year?

Not only that, but the team requires a warm-up suit, special order and embroidered.  We had to by dry-land clothes, special order and embroidered.  We had to buy a polo, again, special order and embroidered.  On top of that, dress pants and shoes.  Seriously?  They're 14 and not professional.  They may be Tier 1, but good Lord.  I know hockey is expensive, but adding all of that ridiculous clothing is just stupid.  So, I was really pissed before I got home.

Besides that and having to listen to Jason whine, parents were already talking about next season.  Next season is the year it gets really serious in our town.  You don't want to be the kid left behind on the tier II.  So far, these kids have had 4 different coaches in 4 years.  Next year, the ones that don't make tier I may end up with another coach.  The last thing these kids need to worry about 4 days before their first trip is making next year's team.

So, I'm frustrated for my child and THAT is my downfall.  I get very passionate about their dilemmas.  To write about Carly would take me another 45 minutes.

HaPpY SePtEmBeR 10th

Yes, it was a fantastic birthday!  I know much of the country is in mourning on this 9-11 weekend.  And Yes, I too remember that tragic day.  I also tried very hard to remember today is my birthday, a day to celebrate all my parents gave to me, including life.  I don't believe that I am disrespectful for celebrating on this day, with my family.  I certainly haven't forgotten that day 10 years ago that changed our country forever.  Today, though, I woke with a drowsy smile and celebrated 38 years of life.

Up at 6am for some coffee and some beautiful Sapphire/diamond earrings from J.  They were sitting on the bathroom counter when I went to brush my teeth.  I certainly didn't deserve them, nor could we afford them probably, but he is amazing in all he does for us.

I enjoyed a cup of coffee while I looked through the computer and got to talk to my sister (Where the Ocean Meets the Sand). Then it was off and running to get Jase up on time and off to the rink.  I enjoyed a couple hours of hockey practice then off to drop him off at "work".

I came home to a lovely surprise party planned by Carly.  Caden had stacked wood in the garage for me and Carly had called my brother and his family and I was greeted by everyone with a grand, "SURPRISE"!  There was pizza so I didn't have to cook, the smell of bleach hanging in the air, clean floors and kitchen and a new propane porch heater similar to this one!

Later, Theresa stopped by with gifts from my her and my dad. He isn't allowed to come over during his recovery process because I have many children and dogs (currently 5 kids ages 9-21 - okay, I didn't give birth to the 19 & 21 yr old, but family just the same - I mean, I cook for them, do laundry, provide a car, buy gas, do their dishes . . .) I totally understand that he couldn't come and I don't want him to compromise his immune system (I took him cake later).  She brought in a vase of flowers and a couple things picked out by my dad while he was in Seattle.

Adorably, he picked out a hat that was black and sparkly that says, "Keep it Gypsy".  I have to admit that I don't know what that implies.  I don't wear hats, but my sis has always worn hats and has a great head for them.  The other gift he picked out was a wind chime.  Wind chimes were my mom's thing.  My dad must have been feeling very nostalgic when he was shopping and the women of his life must have been on his mind. I am honored that the gifts he got me were so, completely and utterly, representative of my mom and sister.
I accept them on their behalf, with my mom on her journey in heaven and my sister on her journey in Idaho.

It's not a crazy face!  Its a wink . . . really!

My B cake!

Yep, looks like a rainbow threw up on the plate.  A delicious vanilla rainbow!

I also baked up a birthday cake for friends and family to enjoy.  I don't eat cake on my diet, but enjoyed licking my fingers a time or two (shhhhhhhhh).

So, yeah, a great birthday.  I got to top it all off with one of my favorite movies.  Ahhhhh, Harry (*sigh*).

Baseball Season, finally ending?

Fairbanks Baseball has gone on and on and on this summer. My outfielder is on his way with two other players and his Dad/Coach to Anchorage for a final weekend of baseball. He's thrilled and excited and can't wait.

I can't even count how many times he has ventured off to Anchorage (400+ miles and 5+hours) for a sport. Mostly hockey until now. This year with high school hockey and baseball, and comp hockey and then Legion baseball, he will be traveling A LOT! He even gets a Seattle trip to Seattle over Christmas break. That one, along with most others, he will be going solo.

I don't feel like he is growing up too fast. I don't feel like one of those mom's that say, "I can't believe . . ." He is ready. He's at that point in his life. He enjoys his parents and family and enjoys telling us about his life. He can't do that if we are up his a** all of the time.

That said, I did something last night I DID NOT want to do. I sat in on part of his comp hockey practice. I stayed to the side and out of the way, not in the bleachers with the mounds of other parents who just can't let go. I stayed in the car most of the time, reading and totally enjoying myself, but then I had to pee.

I was happy to see my son is no longer the smallest kid around . . . and happy to see his "killer" instinct pop out going after the puck, not just other kids. I got to see how the practice was being conducted and see that it involved much hollering, push-ups, and white-boards. New coaches are always interesting to observe. He has a coach back that he had three years ago. Three years ago I'm pretty sure Jason was nothing but an extra body to him with with a bunch of sarcastic remarks and injuries.

I am hoping this year is different. He has such passion for the game. He loves and hates everything about it, but I think his soul would shrivel up if he didn't have it. It is different with baseball. Playing the field is easy. Its like breathing. So is running bases. Hitting is, well, hit-or-miss. But hockey, its what drives him to take that breath. That is probably much to intense for an 14 year old to feel, but I think that is really the only way to describe it.

So, in one weekend, it is so long baseball season and hello hockey.

Oh yeah, and high school is going well. ;o)