Adventures in Subbing

Friday, October 14, 2011

Nutty Days

First, let me tell you about  a typical morning at the Donald House when I have a sub-job.

I am up at 5 (no big deal to many of you I'm sure) to make sure I can leave the house at 8:30.  NNNOOOO it doesn't take me 3 1/2 hours to get ready.  I jump in the shower, lay out my clothes, put on make up. throw on some yoga pants and a tshirt, grab some coffee and then try to wake up 4 people by 6am.

J gets up on his own and gets himself ready so he can leave the house when he needs to.  Occasionally he lends a hand at waking the beasts.  Occasionally.

I start by going to the three rooms, flipping off fans and on lights.  I say a sunny good morning and tell them to get up.  Then I go back to the beginning.  I go into Carly's room and talk with her because she sits up and talks in her sleep, so there isn't any way of knowing she is awake without actually having a conversation with her.
On to the big boys.  I, again, remind them they need to get moving.  They need to leave the house at 6:30.  They have to get up, get ready, make lunch, grab breakfast, start the car, and leave some time for petty arguing and fighting.  Usually, they stroll down stairs with 5 minutes to spare and fight all the way out the door and one of them most likely is leaving without food.  There are sometimes 4 adults in the kitchen at once, dancing around.  You see, I try to make a hot breakfast in the morning.
I check on Jason, who is asleep again.  He really doesn't need to roll out of bed until 6:30 so I don't stress. My husband does though.
Then its back to the big boys room to knock on the door and give them another reminder.  This one includes the weather.
Back to Carly to listen to her dilemmas.  I don't have any pants!  I need a shower!  I'm so tired!  Help me! I am!  I did!  Ugh!  God!  . . . and on and on.
Finally, down the stairs to dry my hair.  When that is done I have to really get on every one's ass about getting up and going.  J is gone, Jake and John are out the door starving in a cold car, Jason is sleeping, and Carly is complaining.  My sweet Caden is sleeping through it all.
Eventually Carly has sufficiently yelled at me and then spends all morning doing her hair.  She may make the bus, but will forget something. Meanwhile, I am most likely making gourmet lunches for my kiddies.  Jason will pull a move right out of The Middle. He'll roll out of bed, eat, get dressed, brush his teeth, pack his bag and make the bus in less than 20 minutes.  All the while yelling at Carly because she is taking too long.
Finally, the house is quiet and I sneak one more cup of coffee.
Then it is up the stairs with the dogs to wake Caden.  I have trained big momma Sister to bark at his bed until he gets up.  Then I go feed the dogs.  Caden may or may not have come down stairs, depends on how long he was up reading.
He will use 1+ to get ready for school.  He'll eat, watch a show, play with the dogs, get dressed after being told 20 times and I turn the tv off.  He'll brush his teeth (I think) and we will usually chit chat and go over last minute things.  Right now I'm remembering that I forgot to sign his homework packet.  OOPS.  But I did pack his teacher a chocolate pudding surprise in his lunch.  While he is getting ready I can straighten up the kitchen and make my lunch.  Sometimes I throw in one more drink of coffee.

I'll send him on his way to the bus, turn off all of the lights, and head out to my car and off to work.

I know we all do it.
On days that I don't work it usually includes driving Carly to school in the middle of the muddle.  She rarely makes the bus.  I took her phone away the last time she missed it.  And I don't have to get up until 6 when I don't have a sub job.  But those days I always make a great breakfast and take care with the kid's lunches.

1 comment:

Amanda said...

We NEVER miss The Middle- it's so our house on most episodes with the exception of all the clutter everywhere- that would make me go insane. Morning are pretty knarly around here as well- your sounds Normal tome-LOL